Brother Ali's take on our country. I love this song.

Smoke and mirrors, stripes and stars
Stoner for the cross in the name of god
Bloodshed, genocide, rape and fraud
Written to the pages of the law, good lord

The co-continent latch key child
Ran away one day and started acting vile
King of where the wild things are, daddy's proud
Cause the roman empire done passed it down

Imported and tortured the work force
They never healed the wounds or shook the curse off
Now the grown up goliath nation
Holdin open auditions for the part of david, can you feel?

Nothing can save you, you question their reign
You get rushed in and chained up
fists raised but I must be insane
Cause I cant figure a single goddamn way to change it

Welcome to the united snakes
Land of the thief, home of the slave
Grant imperial guard where the dollar is sacred
And power is god

Welcome to the united snakes
Land of the thief, home of the slave
Grant imperial guard where the dollar is sacred
And power is god

All must bow to the fact were lazy
The fuck you obey me and why do you hate me
Only two generations away from the
Worlds most despicable slavery trade

Pioneered so many ways to degrade a human being
That it cant be change to this day
Legacy so ingrained in the way that we think
We don't need to wear chains to be slaves

Lord that's a shameful display
The overseers even got raped along the way
Cause the children cant escape from the pain
And theyre born with the poisonous hatred in their veins

Try and separate a man from his soul
Youll only strengthen him and lose your own
Well shoot that fucker if he walk near the throne
Remind him that this is my home (now im gone)

Welcome to the united snakes
Land of the thief, home of the slave
Grant imperial guard where the dollar is sacred
And power is god

Welcome to the united snakes
Land of the thief, home of the slave
Grant imperial guard where the dollar is sacred

You don't give money to the bums
On the corner with a sign, bleeding from their gums
Talking about you don't support a crackhead
What you think happens to the money from yo' taxes

Shit the governments an addict
With a billion dollar a week kill brown people habit
And even if you aint on the front line
When the masta yell crunch time you right back at it

You aint look at how you hustling backwards
And the end of the year add up what they subtracted
3 outta twelve months your salary
Paid for that madness, man that's sadness

Whats left get a big ass plasma
To see where they made Dan rather point the damn camera
Only approved questions get answered
Now stand your ass up for that national anthem

Life Update...Tucker's wedding

Rambling:
It's crazy how everyone just knows everything across the Naz network. I guess I got to a point where I thought that was over and that people were just especially fond of giving me all of the juicy info. But apparently, EVERYBODY KNOWS YOUR BUSINESS (which is pretty cool I guess). So, the night before last I had a great time with my neighbor who is a single 40 year old woman and last night I had a great time with a different single 40 year old woman? Is that awesome? Yes, yes it is. I believe I may have found "my type".

The Wedding:
Also, as far as weddings go, this one was pretty legit. I think if Kel had been able to go with me, she would have had a lot of fun, but hey I probably wouldn't have been able to make the ridiculous comments, enter and exit the dance floor at my leisure, or meet my new 40+ friend. So I guess you've gotta look at the big picture. Congrats to Aaron and Katie, the both of whom I love and respect a whole lot. Also, Greg did a fantastic job of being the charming and casually self-referential pastor who also happens to be the father. I liked that a lot.

What I'm up to:
Alright, so here's the deal with me. Got hired at Alta Vista academy in the southern part of the SD county that we don't like to talk about, so I'm doing that now. Got my adjunct thing lined up for the spring and I'm very excited about that and I'm gonna be doing some volunteer work starting this tuesday. So don't be surprised if you don't hear from me much for the next...well, forever.

My name is Judge:
We got Millie spayed on Friday and that gave me my first opportunity to document her full name (Milford Kelevra Goodkat). So much like Franklin Delano Bluth, we've got her in the system! Now we need to see if we can get her on the witness stand...or at least jury duty.

Rant:
I find it to be hillarious when people ask me if I've heard the Blueprint 3 (or any rap album for that matter). This happened over 25 times last week; I'm not exaggerating at all. People apparently really want to discuss these things but they don't know how to start the conversation so I'm gonna give a little history lesson and advice so that there is no confusion.

Hip-Hop culture is unapologetically self-referential because remaining current and relevant (they are different things) is a key tenant of the game. For that reason, references and remarks can be made and most of the time are made without any introduction or set up. For instance, last week Mos Def launched into a diatribe concerning the Kanye West interview/apology on Jay Leno's show and made his distaste for Leno's lack of sensitivity apparent. He did so by simply saying "Jay Leno, YOU need to apologize". It sums up the fact that he's aware of the interview, he watched it, he knows Kanye apologized and he didn't like the interviewers invocation of the name of the deceased. The lesson to learn is that it's both easy and acceptable to make reference to something in pop culture or hip-hop culture with the assumption that I will be aware of it if you're reasonably sure that I would be under normal circumstances. That being said, if you're not sure, here's a pretty good litmus test: Ask yourself "Do I know about this?" If your answer is yes, then so do I.

Got some work to do

I've been longing to revisit the days where I could challenge someone to look me in my eye and tell me that I'm not living the dream (little inside). I've got some work to do, I guess. It seems like I'm not the only one. Apparently, people are having a tough time all over the place. The part that sucks is that I think I have the answer. We can lift each other up! I just don't know if it's the right time to approach that subject.

Had a good Monday. Let's work on Tuesday and get this week rolling.

(Not) Depressed

One of my favorite people recently said that she can only write in streamofconsciousness these days. Ditto.

Lately, I've found that being not depressed is tougher that being down in the dumps. I think that's because the circumstances haven't changed but the prospects just seem a little more bright. People ask me what changed and I haven to say that I don't know. That may be the hardest thing of all. One good thing that has come out of those few dark weeks was that my laptop is now a time-capsule. I wrote some pretty raw feelings in word docs before my power cord fiasco and as soon as I get a new one, I'll be looking forward to going back to read them and to understand what was happening in this head of mine. There is still so much left to do but I'm learning in practice what people mean when they talk about claiming the victory while you're in the battle. The best part for me is that I hit the ground running when I got out of the funk. What I learned was that you're not going to feel like talking, but you really need to. I swear, that Moser is wise beyond her years. So I've been making myself available to people when I see those signs that I'm all too familiar with. Good times.

I'm thinking really seriously about joining the Air Force like my friend Chris. I can go straight to OCS according to the recruiter that I've been talking to and the rest of my education will be funded by our engorged Department of Defense budget. In addition, I'll get to see some more of the world and learn how to converse with military people (well, kinda). One of the most important lessons that I ever learned from Chris is that the people who love us rarely come along at the opportune moment and that we'd like to think that they will always be there for us. Life's lessons to me have often been some variation of the idea that those people are not always there. It's like getting a job in way: even if you're the right man for the job, if you're not ready to accept the offer they'll settle for the 2nd best if he can start on monday. At some point, I guess you've done the interview for him! All he has to do is walk in and say "I'm just like that guy, except I'm ready right now." I can see why they like you, you're just like me!

p.s.- The pic is from freshmen year of college with my RA. We decided to switch wardrobes for a day...click the pic for my current favorite song

I'm back

After a silence that has felt like an eternity, G-d is speaking to me again. I would like to think that means the hard times are over. But if I remember correctly, that's not how this works.

I never want to be alone again.

you thought I was down
you thought I was gone
that I went around
thought I left you alone

but look up in the sky
just look up in the sky
see that I'm everywhere
shining down on you

The beginning of understanding

[I apologize for masculine terms for G-d. When I picture my creator, I see my dad.]

Yesterday, I wrote something. Then I left the room, got something to drink and came back to it. When I did, I realized that what I written was blasphemous (actually blasphemous, in all seriousness) and I was afraid. I was afraid of offending this unseen character in my life. I knew that these words would encroach on HIS territory and I did not want to be responsible for shouldering the reprisal of that action. I don't know who He is, what He wants, or what I can do about it, but I know that I fear Him. And the fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom.

I need that sometimes. When things are going the way that they are currently going, it gets easy to let cynicism and doubt rule my thoughts and speech. Recognizing that there is a limit, knowing that some things are still unacceptable means that despite how I feel, "the real me" is still somewhere in there. I just have to find him.

Tell Obama I'm not a pirate! Don't shoot

I got this letter yesterday from some television/movie/music/world domination network accusing me of being a pirate. Apparently, piracy is still happening somewhere outside of the seas surrounding Somalia. Anywho, they think I've been sneaking into their studios at night and stealing their movies and selling them out of the back of my pirate ship.

Now I don't mind if people make mistakes, but just don't let the President hear that you think I'm a pirate. Because I heard he shot the last guys accused of treachery on the high seas!

Heres the letter:

Re:  Infringement of NBC Universal Properties
Notice ID: 14-17986814
20 May 2009 01:04:56 GMT

Dear Sir/Madam:

I am contacting you on behalf of NBC Universal, Inc. and its affiliated companies ("NBC Universal") regarding certain activity on your Internet account. NBC Universal owns intellectual property rights, including exclusive rights protected under copyright law, in many motion pictures, television programs and other audiovisual works ("NBC Universal Properties"). Based on our data, we believe that your Internet account was recently used to reproduce and/or distribute unauthorized copies of one or more NBC Universal Properties in violation of NBC Universal's rights. We have set forth below the details concerning this infringement, including the title(s) in question, the IP address of the account at the time of the infringement, and the date and time of the infringement.

Your Internet service provider (ISP) has agreed to forward this notice to you in order to provide you an opportunity to remedy this situation. Your ISP has not provided your personal information to us, but NBC Universal reserves the right to obtain that information through legal process in appropriate circumstances.

Unauthorized copying or distribution of copyrighted works may give rise to significant liability for copyright infringement, including statutory damages of up to $150,000 per infringed work for willful infringement. Such action may also constitute a violation of your Internet provider's Terms of Use and may result in suspension or termination of your Internet service account. Accordingly, we request that you immediately: (1) cease from any further unlawful copying or distribution of NBC Universal Properties; and (2) delete any unauthorized copies of NBC Universal from your computer.

We encourage you to learn the facts about Internet piracy, including the economic harm that piracy causes to creative industries in the United States and the danger of exposure to viruses, worms, hacking and identity theft as a result of using peer-to-peer file sharing networks. Information regarding Internet piracy may be found on the web site http://www.mpaa.org/piracy.asp, which is maintained by the Motion Picture Association of America for the purpose of educating consumers.

A true and correct list of the titles of the NBC Universal Properties which NBC Universal believes in good faith have been illegally offered for downloading using your Internet account is noted below.

We would be pleased to respond to any questions or concerns you may have concerning this notice. You may direct any such questions or concerns to us through the following Internet site: LINK REMOVED Please include the Notice ID in the subject line of any correspondence.

The undersigned has a good faith belief that use of the NBC Universal Property or Properties in the manner described herein is not authorized by NBC Universal, its agent(s) or the law. The information contained in this notification is accurate. Under penalty of perjury, the undersigned is authorized to act on behalf of NBC Universal with respect to this matter.

This letter is not intended to be a complete statement of the facts or law as they may pertain to this matter, or of NBC Universal's positions, rights or remedies, legal or equitable, all of which are specifically reserved.

Very truly yours,

Mark Ishikawa
CEO, BayTSP inc.
c/o NBC Universal Anti-Piracy Technical Operations
100 Universal City Plaza
Universal City, CA 91608

tel. (818) 777-4876
fax (818) 866-2026
antipiracy@nbcuni.com